To the Redwoods and Beyond!

In case you want to sift through lots of pictures about the Redwoods...
we survived - and the true test of survival included Stella asking about going camping 3 days after arriving home.

WIN!

By the end of the week, we definitely learned what we didn't need on the trip, how to most quickly and effectively pack and unpack a van, and I learned how to fight the dog for the right to sit in the front seat. (I didn't always win, I will tell you that). Stella did amazing with the amount of driving we did - and although we thought she would blissfully sleep through most of it, she did not, but still was a happy girl amusing herself most of the time. I only had to break out the laptop and the Beatrix Potter DVD on the last day (which, admittedly, was our longest drive of the trip).

Some highlights:

One night we stopped at a little Indian place for dinner since we were staying in a concrete RV park and knew we couldn't make dinner. Stella drained an entire mango lassi in 5 minutes flat. Then proceeded to inhale all of my basmati rice and my dal (lentils.) Guess she was hungry.

Stella noticed a state of California flag at one location and I explained to her that it was a bear on the flag. For some reason, I thought it was a golden bear (but then later realized that a golden bear is UC Berkeley's mascot and the state flag is merely a regular ol' bear). Stella then sang the song "Golden Bear" to the tune of "Twinkle, Twinkle" most of the whole trip. The lyrics, you ask? Golden bear oh golden bear, golden bear, a golden bear. Golden bear, a golden bear.... :) I have it on video somewhere. It will be the next post most certainly.

By mid-week, Scupper started refusing to get back in the van after we stopped for a hike or got out to explore an area. Think he was done with it?

We kept saying how huge the trees were. We felt rather dumb, but each time we would see another one, we would say to each other, wow, that's a big one.

Stella was very good with the potty and her underwear on the trip. She also has a fascination with going in public restrooms, much to my hygiene chagrin. Every time we came out of the bathroom, whether it was at the campground or out in about, she was shout to whomever was outside, "I just went on the big girl potty!"

We loved Northern California. If anyone has jobs for us up there, let us know. We are ready to move. Preferably Sonoma County, north of the Bay Area.

Camping Trip

The Digital Age

More about the awesome trip to the Redwoods and back later, but today so I don't forget it:

Okay Stella! Let's go take Scuppy on a walk. He's waiting. We'll take the long way so we see all the different horses on the way.

Stella: (picking up her play phone) Hello?

Who are you calling?

Stella: (matter of factly) The Horses.

Oh.

Stella: Lucy? Hi. We coming to see you!

Brilliant. Nice to know that Lucy the neighborhood pony is on AT&T wireless.

EDITED:
Stella has also been saying "Yes indeed" and "yes Ma'am" to us when we ask her things. It's rather odd. She draws out the Yes, so it turns into "Yesssss... (pause) indeed!" Steve has been trying to explain to her that he is not a "ma'am" but rather a Sir, so last night's respond turned into "yess..... sir ma'am." Ah well, at least she is inclusive.

Attempting to go where no man... oh who are we kidding?

So on Friday night, we leave for a week's vacation. This is weird for us, because since Stella has been born (and hell, let's be honest, since I think 2005?) our vacations longer than a long weekend have been to visit family. Not that this has been bad - it has actually been lovely, but the locations are still to places that we've been before - Southern Illinois, Delaware, Chicago. The other trips Steve and I have taken in the last few years have been solo flights - and either to conferences (oh thrilling) or interviews (even more thrilling). Our trip in 2005 was a week long trip up to San Francisco and back (funny enough, the first 2 days were in San Fran because of a conference!) but the rest of the week was spent in Napa, Sonoma, and the Big Sur and Central Coast.

We are attempting to revisit some of this coastline, but intend to high-tail it pass the Bay Area and make it to at least Eureka. (which is about 1 hr south of the CA/OR border). See, the Vanagon needs to go through the big Redwoods, snake through the Avenue of the Giants, and stop by some NorCal microbreweries that might have outdoor seating that will accommodate a TODDLER AND A DOG. (pretty funny, eh?)

Yep. I'm a little trepidatious. 9 days in the VW with a dog (who currently has the runs and we are hoping is better before Friday) and a toddler who, frankly, is really happy everywhere as long as she gets a nap and sleeps well. We are hoping for the best. I mean, it's not like we are planning on stealth camping (like that would EVEN be possible) and we are certainly not going away from civilization, as we have planned our route to hit the various campgrounds along the way, or as one VW forum member calls them "pay per view sites." We have no aspirations to do major hiking. We have no aspirations that we will sleep well every night. We have no aspirations that there will be no crying, or bug bites, or at least one crazy poopy blowout diaper.

But that's ok. We are adding a big trip to the already full "family vacation camping lore" that surrounds the Germonskis. And one little girl is VERY excited. In fact, today when faced with crappy choices at Kmart (our only box store for 45 minutes around here) she started to cry that they didn't have any camp chairs her size. "I want a geen one Mama!" We're working on it. At least somewhere along the way, there has got to be a Target, right?

So if anyone has a favorite camp meal (since I won't be doing my regular gourmet chefing on this trip!) let us know. And cross your fingers, say a prayer, or a thought of inspiration - whatever strikes you - next week when you think, god, I wonder if those Germonskis are surviving that crazy trip?

Stars Mama, Stars!

It has been a busy few weeks. And I dare say, Miss Stella is in love with the outdoors even more than she was before.

A few weekends ago (but sadly, it feels like months) we met some dear friends from San Diego at a campground about an hour away. We were rather nervous - it was supposed to be in the 90s during the day and the 90s with 2 dogs, 5 adults, and one toddler didn't sound great to me... but the weather gods looked down on us with pity and gave us a breeze, a fully shaded campsite - and the best part of all - a creek running through it. So Steve and I did something we have never done before on a camping weekend. We hung out at the campsite the whole dang day. Sitting/walking/wading in the creek keep the heat index from feeling like it really was 90, and of course, said toddler was happier than a pig in... well, happier than a toddler could be. I'm also happy to report that there were no real camping mishaps - maybe with the addition of other families we were saved from the camping curse we seem to invite.

Yes, that's a rubber chicken next to her - dog toys often end up as Stella toys at some point in the day.

Stella also helped contemplate the next repairs needed on Melanie and Apryl's bus:

And found a new friend in their dog... (about this she was pretty stoked as Scupper, although a very good boy, refuses to let Stella pet him)

Is that camping happiness or what? Actually, when we finally arrived in the driveway from the weekend away, Stella sat firmly in her car seat and wouldn't get out. Stella, we're home. "No, I don't want be home. More camping. More camping." Guess we made a convert.

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In other Germonski adventure news, we traveled up to Chico to visit Steve's extended family. Steve's mom is the oldest of 6 and 5 of the siblings converged on his aunt's house for a weekend of fun family stories, great cooking, and, the best part for Stella, lots of great aunties who wanted to snuggle, sing "Twinkle Twinkle," read books, and listen to 4-6 word sentence stories. Sadly, we forgot to take a single picture. Yes really. 

We did however drive to Chico in the dead of night so that Stella would sleep in the car and we wouldn't have to figure out how to entertain her for an 8 hour car ride. This involved lots of caffeine. To make Stella understand what we were doing, I explained to her that we were going to Auntie Gloria's when the moon popped up and the stars came out. "Baby stars too?" she asked, as we readied for bed, and Steve packed the car. Yes, sure, baby stars. We woke her up at 10pm and put her into the car, thinking that she would fall back to sleep. I wish I could capture the wonder on her face as we drove out of the driveway in the dark of night, the sparkle in her eyes as she marveled at the moon and all the stars (mama and baby ones) as we headed towards the freeway. She ended up staying up in the backseat for at least 45 minutes, just marveling at the night sky. To be that honest with emotion, to be that joyful at something that we tend to take for granted, to be so entranced with a late night getaway... I hope I can remember it and tell her about it when she is older.

That being said, since we returned home, she keeps asking about getting up in the middle of the night when the moon pops out and the baby stars come out. Oops.

Costumes... and a Grilling sort of Fourth

Don't remind me that we're both in theater and that it may run in the family, ok?

We have been doing, what I'd like to term, "Potty Training Lite" or "Potty Training Version 1.0" or as others might call it, "Mommy's version of Half-Assed Potty Training". Since it's easier for Stella to just wear the underwear and a shirt, she found some old baby legs that we had when she was an infant and has now since enjoyed wearing "leg warmers" all the time. With rain boots. And a fleece monkey hat. Because why not?

 Our friend Ali found this bargain thrift store find for her... and it finally fits. I like to call this shot "Waiting for Mr. Darcy."Because who wouldn't wait for him if he was played by Colin Firth?

Homemade smoothie Popsicles have also become a sort of costume...

And speaking of costumes, check out our TP owl family!

Fourth of July weekend for us was all about Steve and this "i found it on the street with a sign that said free" charcoal grill. We did stuffed mushrooms (shown here), salmon skewers, za'atar spiced chicken, and BBQ ribs. Along with carrots, green beans, zucchini, broccoli, grilled pizzas, and naan. All on the grill over the weekend. And let's not forget the orange creamsicle ice cream... and the malted milk with chocolate sliver ice cream. Yah, we went a little nuts. But it was practically a 4 day weekend for us, and since we had no where to go in particular, we cooked. It was a tasty stay-cation.

Stella had fun in the outfit that my aunt Melanie bought her last summer.

And, in the outfit of her own creation - she was so excited to go in the $10 Rite-Aid plastic pool that she put her swimming suit OVER HER CLOTHES, backwards.

Scupper was on hand to wait for rib pieces...

And possible ice cream that could have dropped on the ground.

(and check out the patio set that I got on craigslist for $30 - one layer of paint and we were good to go.)  After enjoying many dinner out there this weekend, Steve and I sat and laughed out loud that 1) we had a "patio set" and 2) we actually had a deck to put it on... It might not be ours but we are sure going to take advantage of it while we can this summer.

Now it's off to go camping this weekend. Let's hope we don't have any camping fails to tell about when we get back. It IS supposed to be 99 out there, so we'll see if we just end up submerged in a backwoods creek all weekend.

Some thoughts on time of life, motherhood...you know, nothing big.

I am currently reading a book entitled Bad Mother -- mostly because I always criticize myself at being one and figured I had better get in the club with the rest of them... The book, a memoir of strung together chapters, really speaks to the point I am in my journey of motherhood - and as many of us know, it certainly is a bumpy ride. How is it that our society has created such a mystique about what it means to be a good mother? How cannot we celebrate the things that we are good at - and cherish that those elements make us the "good" mothers that we truly are? I have found myself criticizing my daily activities with Stella, because, well, mostly the activities that we do are things that need to get done around the house anyway. Are these things fun for her? Is it mentally stimulating? Is she learning? Why the hell am I being neurotic about it all? Somehow she all of a sudden knows a circle, square and star. Did I teach those to her? Probably not. (Thank god for preschool).

What she has learned from me is how to knead bread properly, how to dip chips in salsa (yes, my 26 month old eats salsa), scat identification (Mommy, dog poo! Mommy, horse poo!), and how to identify particular cars on the road. Seriously, she knows what other Vanagons, Jeeps, and Subaru Outback Wagons look like because those are all the cars either we have (said Van) or cars that our neighbors drive. Is she her daddy's daughter or what? Are these helpful things to know at 2? Probably not. But that is what we have passed along to her at this point.

And yet, beyond all my neurosis of making sure she gets what she needs at this point in her developing brain, Stella continues to astound and amaze us. This week, when asked idly by me what she'd like to wear to school (and not expecting really any answer), she announced that she would like to wear her owl shirt and jeans. Um, ok, I sputtered, practically spitting out my tea. Sure, we can do that. I got dirty looks from an older couple the other day at the beach, when on our way to the sand, Stella announced that we "Need Scuppy poo bag" and after I picked one from the holder, she replied, "Mommy, I hold it." They looked aghast. No, idiots, I'm not going to let my daughter pick up our dog's poo, but at least she knows what we're supposed to do as responsible dog owners. She has been going to a dog park since about 3 weeks old. Her speech therapist cracked up this week when Stella told her what all the neighbors were up to during the day. "Carl work. Drive truck. Truck loud. Mique home soon. Tom ride bike work."

All of these experiences are part of that whole "nurture" thing right? We can't obviously change her genes, but I hope to hell that the Germonski way of nurture works out ok. I was and never have been the type of person to "blame" my parents for the choices I have made or the way I grew up. If anything, maybe I wished they had been more strict in making sure I chose a more fiscally responsible career than theatre, but of course, I am more than blessed that they acquiesced when I wanted to follow the path that I did. I hope that Stella will come to appreciate the fact that we populate our world with bread dough, bicycles, tomato plants, books, and thrift store surprises. I guess only time will tell...

And speaking of where our kids will end up, I too have been assessing my own life and career, and in turn, how the choices we make affects our family. I was offered a teaching job on Monday, one at this moment, my gut is telling me to walk on by. This is hard for me to admit, as I have been desperately hoping to get back into my career, going crazy being at home only interacting with a toddler and dog all day long. And yet, when faced with a full-time offer, I am starting to balk. Have I settled into this life? This life of being labeled as "Mom" first and not "Professor?" Does that make the last 6 hard-won years of our life null and void? Or does it just make me honest? Certainly, it speaks to the precipice that I think all women face when offered career choices that conflict with the overall stability of the family, regardless of whether that family involves children or not.

As much as Steve does around the house (all the dishes, the laundry, all the car work, the lawn, share of dog and kid duties), I know that he still feels that he should be the one working to make the lion's share of our income. Society has conditioned him to believe that, regardless of how egalitarian our relationship has always been. And yet, although I do the all the cooking (because, let's face it, I do love it), the grocery shopping, and household budget/bill paying on time duties, I am indescribably torn between being home for my daughter and pursuing the career that I have been in school EIGHT EXTRA YEARS for (not to mention the $^@#!K in school loans that are going to come knocking soon). Why must I have to feel that career vs family care is a life or death choice? And either/or choice? Why cannot it be a both/and?

Of course, it can. Many women take their only allowable pittance of six week maternity leave and put their wee babe into childcare and go back to work. Because they have to. I am lucky. I know that. I work a part-time job from my home, but for the most part, my family is provided for by my husband's salary. But here I am aching to be back in the classroom with those wacky 18-21 year olds, and yet I question the choice because of a special 2 yr old who fills my heart with such joy and anguish and frustration and love that I tetter between giving it all up and yet knowing that I would lose myself if I did.

I remember thinking as a young girl - let's say 11 or 12, that I wanted a good, secure job when I grew up. You know, security. Comfort. Guess I was a bit of an eejit going into theater but let's pass that on by for the moment. Do we all secretly crave a bit of stasis? A bit of rest? A bit of "let me be in this moment for a bit longer without my whole life being in upheaval yet again and having to make another serious decision?"

Ramble, ramble. Thanks for reading. Any thoughts and/or advice are welcomed. I'm just waiting for banana bread to be done in the oven. You know. Cooking. Baking. Things I know how to do.

Snippets

A month in pictures and overheard statements, because sadly, Mama doesn't have the time for more...

Overheard:

Stella (pretending to talk on the phone): Hi Scuppy.
Mama: Stella? Are you talking to Scupper on the phone?
Stella: Yah.
Mama: Oh. Well, what is Scupper saying to you?
Stella: (listening) Arf Arf!

****************
Mama: Stella, please don't move your chair that way, you'll tip it over and fall.
Stella: and I would cry.
Mama: Yes, you would cry.
Stella: (fake crying) eh he he
Daddy: Stella, do you want another bite of dinner?
Stella: No, Daddy, I'm crying.

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Scupper: Bark Bark Bark (in the yard)
Stella: (from bedroom when I thought she was taking a nap) No Scuppy! I'm sleeping!

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 I love this photo - don't ask me why. It's just the phase that Stella is in.

 First haircut. She would only sit on Grammy's lap, not by herself, and she was very trepidacious about the whole thing. However, she really needed it - it was starting to look mullet-esque.

 Chilling with Daddy after hiking to the beach.

 Rockin' the beach fort Memorial Day Weekend.

 First face painting. She was a little confused afterwards because she thought the lady was going to GIVE her a butterfly, not put one on her face. Oh well. Maybe we'll wait until three for another one.

Checking to make sure Mama and Daddy are there, during the little performance her preschool gave.

 Now fully accepting the butterfly.

 Playing dress-up, looking very much like she was out of a Jane Austen film adaptation. Maybe she is looking for Mr. Darcy.

That's us - the wacky threesome who hang out during the day, trying to have fun until Daddy comes home from work. Notice the smears of little fingers on the mirror. Oh well. No one ever said I was a good housekeeper. ;)